Today I was on my journey and studied a little in Exodus 3 and 4. And I found myself speechless. I have been given an opportunity this next year to "risk the ocean" as me. Not the entire Ward family like usual, but me. Just me. Jen. Jen is about to risk the ocean all by herself. And I've spent years denying who God created me to be. I've spent decades squelched by voices from the past that simply spit on my flame. (Definitely not talking about my parents here, although I know that generally that's where blame seems to get pointed, but not here.) And I don't want to point fingers anywhere specifically, but that's exactly what happened to me as a young child. Somehow I heard and embraced the voice(s) that I was not good enough. I was not smart enough. I was not able to be what I was... created to be. Sure, I had other voices who spoke into my life, including my parents who prayed for me, over me and constantly taught me right from wrong and gave me all the tools I needed to pursue righteousness. But, you know how some voices are louder than others... Here are the words today that stopped me dead in my tracks:
10 But Moses said to the Lord, “Oh, my Lord, I am not eloquent, either in the past or since you have spoken to your servant, but I am slow of speech and of tongue.”11 Then the Lord said to him, “Who has made man's mouth? Who makes him mute, or deaf, or seeing, or blind? Is it not I, the Lord? 12 Now therefore go, and I will be with your mouth and teach you what you shall speak.” 13 But he said, “Oh, my Lord, please send someone else.” Exodus 4:10-13English Standard Version (ESV)
Whose voice are you listening to today? And what are they saying to you? Don't waste your life living on a foundation of voices that are faulty! What is the Lord been doing in your heart? And what has been your response to Him? Please take a minute or two or three and invite the Lord into your ocean. Ask Him to show you how He's wanting to use you. Ask Him to make it clear what he wants you to be about this coming year. And please don't respond like Moses and I have for so many years, "please send someone else to do it." Embrace grace! Embrace who He created you to be. Trash the lies. Okay? And REPLY even if only to say you took a few minutes to listen to Him, ask, trash the lies and embrace the Truth!
