How Long Must I Sing This Song?

Today is "Day 64"... sixty four days ago we hit a brick wall. (Thankfully, it was not a literal brick wall.) It certainly stopped us dead in our tracks. We were so very excited to be re-united with Brynna and be on US soil and serving in a church - a new Faith Family, but things quickly and abruptly came to a complete stop. We hadn't even been in Texas for a week! ALL of the days of September 2015 in our NEW little world were deep, dark, desperate days and the Lord had a bunch to teach us in those shadows. There were many, many moments when one, two or all three of us "felt like" giving up... on life. Thankfully we are not a family who lives on feelings. We live on the Truth. Jesus, only Jesus.  I'll spare you every single detail, but try to give you enough of the picture to understand where we've been and why we've been so quiet.

On August 3rd we returned to the states. On August 8th our son, Josiah was married. On August 12th we began our two day journey in a UHaul and our old grey truck to our new home in Texas to serve with The Harbor (formerly known as Friendswood Community Church). We were unable to secure housing of our own and made a "deal" with a Haiti team member from our new church to live with her for a few months. Her name is Myra and she's honestly the BEST of everything. She opened up her brand new, gorgeous home and is allowing us to occupy the entire second floor. She gave us over half the pantry to put our food and cleaned out the entire fridge so that we can put our perishables in it. (She uses a fridge in the garage.) We can never, ever explain how grateful we are or how welcomed we have felt by her to this new life. She is an amazing person who passionately serves others who are struggling in the world. 

When we arrived in Texas we were generously given a week of vacation and a week at the beach house of another Harbor Haiti team member and his family. Our pastor(s) wanted us to be fully rested before we jumped in to this new ministry and boy were we happy to take a week for ourselves and to re-adjust to life in the US. In the middle of the week and the middle of the night something huge changed us forever.

What we call "Day One" happened smack dab in the middle of the vacation week at the beach. On August 19, 2015 - Chris woke up in intense, agonizing pain. This pain was unbearable. It kept him from sleeping, eating, or really doing anything much other than trying to cope. Brynna and I felt completely helpless. We just didn't know what to do or think. He had been sick back in March in Haiti and then we returned in April and he had test after test where the specialist concluded he had active H-Pylori bacteria in his digestive track. When we returned to Haiti in May he was taking many prescriptions. Two of which were anti-biotics to help flush out the bad bacteria in his body. They were Cipro and Flagyl.

That August night at the beach we didn't know what to think. He had pretty much gotten back to "normal" as the summer progressed in Haiti. But that night the sharp, intense pain sent our minds racing. He went to the ER, Urgent Care and eventually a specialist. (Not all in one night.) The doctors did their "thing" but still half of the pain remained after two weeks. And it was never ending. And I mean never. Ending. Ever. He was prescribed many pain relievers that did nothing but knock him out or loopy so that he wasn't completely "with it". He took perkiset, valium, oxy-this and oxy-that, flexerill and on and on and on. He was in pain 24 hours a day for just over two weeks. The specialist also prescribed Cipro and Flagyl because he believed there may be an abscess that needed some help.

On August 30 Chris very suddenly felt a very deep and intense depression. We called the specialist who had prescribed the meds medly and he said to stop taking all the meds and come into the office the next day first thing. We were all confused. How could this even be? Chris doesn't feel depression. He feels lots of compassion and lots of empathy, but never depression. 
The specialist ordered a CT scan to explore other reasons for the pain. As we waited for the results for two very long, dreadful days the depression worsened and even began this swinging of the pendulum where he experienced completely opposite feelings of anxiety. Full on fear. He found himself wrapped up in intense adrenaline and fear even though he had absolutely nothing to be afraid of. Then we began to watch as the cycle began to wind itself up. It swung back and forth between the two extremes until he finally landed in anxiety land.  
On September 2 when we finally went to the ER, they admitted him and kept him for three very long days. Days which he doesn't even remember. Brynna and I do. Vividly. Our rock was crushed and we didn't know what to do without him being strong. Those days were full of texts to our kids and their spouses full of information without answers.

We didn't understand how our solid rock could be experiencing these extremes. On the second day in the hospital the intense physical pain disappeared as quickly as it had come into our lives. And we were left with no answer as to what had caused it and even harder to take - the shear anxiety twenty hours a day. Brynna and I never left his side. At some point we took turns so we could clear our own minds and hearts. The doctors assumed that a trio of meds they had prescribed must have taken care of the pain/abscess and we should continue taking all three to the end of the script. Two of the three were Cipro and Flagyl. We were thankful for these drugs at this point and I very loudly blamed the depression/anxiety on the previous strong pain meds.

We were in a new state with a new church family and we just didn't know who we could completely trust with this kind of information. There were only a few people who really knew the REAL Chris Ward in Texas and we didn't want any new people to ever know the man we were now seeing. In fact, I told him that I totally believed an alien had taken over his body. He was not there. We could not find him anywhere. My phone was a great source of encouragement as it brought loving and prayerful texts from our kids - Rachael & Quinton and Josiah & Katie, our dearest friends from Haiti - Mark & Melanie Dearing, from Kevin & Leah Pate, Greg & Tammy Young, Rick & Linda Bowden, our new pastor Rick & Marie Baldwin, Krystal Bailey, Mike & Heather DiEnno, Michele Sherwin, Steve & Jane Shelby, and Ginger & Dr. Bob Boone. We could never have made it through those deepest, darkest days without them approaching the Throne of Grace on our behalf.

The easiest way for me to describe it to Rachael once night was, "it's like I imagine PTSD." Intense, fierce, gripping fear coupled with adrenaline on overdrive 20 hours a day. I couldn't see how he was going to be able to get past this. We were now up to Labor Day. Take a break if you need to. It's half time. Go get a cup of coffee. Join us below this break.


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"I waited patiently for the Lord. He inclined and heard my cry. He brought me up out of the pit, out of the mire and clay. He set my feet upon a rock and made my footsteps firm.
Many will see
Many will see and fear.
 I will sing, sing a new song, I will sing, sing a new song
How long to sing this song, how long to sing this song
How long, how long, how long, how long, to sing this song?" 40 by U2


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After we had returned from the hospital stay we were just counting the hours till the meds were flushed out of his system and he would "come back" to us. I knew it had to be the pain meds and boy was I angry with the pills and everyone who made them and put them into our hands. But, the hours and the days dragged on and there was no sign of the man we knew. At one point he uttered the words, "I must be having a nervous breakdown," to which we replied, "absolutely not!" He's as healthy and steady as they come. There was one friend who constantly reminded me that this all began with a physical pain and that it was unlikely "just a nervous breakdown" (thank you Leah for reminding us of that). It was real as real gets, but it's origin had to be something more than a nervous system shutdown. But, we literally were just getting by. A couple weeks went by and we still couldn't get him to eat much. He wasn't eating or sleeping. We called him our "newborn" because we felt like we had to train him to eat and sleep all over again. The adrenaline/fear/anxiety that was so constant allowed him absolutely no room for rest. The Chris we knew and loved could fall asleep at 5 pm before dinner sitting in an uncomfortable chair. He was flexible. He was chill. But, this new Chris who had come home from the hospital could not sleep. Or rest. Or relax. Or focus. His mind was a racing machine. We started recognizing the cycle that he was on and it just wouldn't stop. 

On Labor Day Eve we got a phone call from Dr. Bob Boone who is a member of the board at our new church and an Orthopedist. He had heard that Chris was still not able to get out of the house... let alone our bedroom. And he just wanted to check in and see how he could help. So, I told him the story of how Chris wouldn't/couldn't eat or rest/relax and how an alien had taken over his body. Dr. Bob said that he had a cousin who was a missionary to Africa for 20 years and is now practicing medicine here in the area. His cousin offered to see Chris in his home at 8 am on Labor Day. Would Chris be willing to get out and talk with him? Absolutely! Dr. Paul Boone spent well over an hour with us looking over the two pages of notes I had written about meds and doses and symptoms. (Most of which I left out of this blog because I'm just trying to tell the broad story here... and ain't nobody got time for all that!) He looked up a thing or two in a couple different books and even online. He asked lots of questions and we went way back to March when Chris had first gotten sick in Haiti. He had two suggestions and we clung tightly to his advice. He suggested we double one of the meds Chris was taking for anxiety. The other very important suggestion was to cease taking Cipro. He brought up that an infection had not been proven with blood work and his colleague had had a year off of work because of what Cipro had done to her muscles. It had left her in a bad place unable to function and work. We agreed and stopped taking that med. So, we left his home with hope that things could change with the changes we were making. We will forever be grateful for this man of God who took us in on a holiday into his home and poured over the details of what we were facing and prayerfully offered advice. Forever.

We set up an appointment to see him the next Monday in his office. We tweaked a med or two and left his office grateful and hopeful. We were on to something. Chris was eating a little bit. Myra had bought this fresh squeezed orange juice that was superb and Brynna or I would bring it to him first thing every morning and tell him it was his "sunshine" and he had to drink it. Myra taught us how to make healthy smoothies in the awesome blender she has and we started squeezing that into his diet each day at least once and sometimes at that point - twice. That was really all he could/would eat. Myra also made some homemade vegetable soup and he enjoyed that. He could only handle a half a bowl at a time and we cheered the day he ate an entire bowl! Those were big victories back then. It was a deep, dark, desperate chapter in our lives. We longed for him to return to normal. 

Very, very slowly we saw tiny bits of progress. It had been over a month and he was still unable to get out of the house and be in a state of any productivity. He is a perfectionist and it was so very frustrating for him. He wanted to be back at work jumping in to this new chapter of our lives. But, he was stuck and we had no idea why. We were able to get in to see a Christian Counselor and he helped give some strategies for overcoming the unreal fears and major anxiety he was feeling. Nothing made much sense. We watched the cycles and realized he was having a couple hours of "good" in the evenings. So, we started playing with how we may adjust the meds to make the "good" hours happen in the mornings. He got to the point where he felt decent right before bedtime and didn't want to go to sleep because then it would start the crazy cycle all over again. And when you wake up with full on fear for no reason, it's not a feeling you look forward to... none of us did, but he fiercely avoided it.

There were times when we just watched and wished for the answer to come. An explanation would be nice. We were told it was just the "perfect storm" that we had found ourselves in. Brynna said she'd give anything just to know what he was feeling for just 5 minutes. And she truly meant it. It was just excruciating to watch him go through these cycles. These extremes.  We read scripture out loud over him praying answers would come. 

We had a big conference to attend September 22-26 and we didn't know if we were going to be able to benefit from making the trip. Our counselor encouraged Chris to push through and give himself the freedom to miss sessions, but go and take in whatever he could. So, that's what Chris decided. So, we packed. We prayed. We cried. Wondering all the while if he would be able to walk onto an airplane without fear paralyzing him. The morning of September 22 is when the brick wall that we had hit on August 19 started to crumble before us. When I woke up I noticed I had a text from our son-in-law in Louisville. He told me that he had told his mom, Kim Bruce, what Chris had been going through and she had told him that a co-worker of hers, Lori Ciresi Winstel, had gone through a very similar illness. He cut and pasted a paragraph or two from Lori's experience and it sounded almost identical to Chris' journey thus far. What?!? An answer?!!! So, he gave us her phone number and we immediately called her and put her on speaker phone. She explained what she has been going through and what she had learned about it. It has a name. It's a beast and the name we learned on this day was "Fluoroquinolone Toxicity Syndrome". Basically, some people are pre-disposed to be "poisoned" by "floxie" or "quin" anti-biotics. You guessed it, Cipro and Flagyl. These anti-biotics have a "black box warning" on them, but we don't hear or know about these warnings... we just get them prescribed to us constantly. I won't get all mad and go batty now, but basically his illness in March gave reason to flush out all the bacteria in his body. The anti-biotics he took- took it even a step farther - they retrained his cells to produce bad bacteria instead of good. His very DNA was altered by meds. They call it being "floxed". Check out FloxieHope.

She suggested that there is an e-book that many people had purchased and it was their saving grace. She also suggested getting on a probiotic, adding magnesium supplements and adding a pure multi-vitamin. So, within 30 minutes we had bought the book, read the first few chapters, but we had a plane to catch to Nashville, so I ran out to the Nature's Garden Market to buy those expensive, but totally worth every dollar, organic pills. And he started taking them immediately. Before we even left the house. He was able to see a difference even within those first 24 hours. A positive difference. At the conference he stayed in the hotel room until he'd gotten down enough breakfast to swallow the slew of pills and worked through the anxiety enough to face the world... usually before lunch he was able to join us. And that week he had longer cycles of "good" times. He was able to enjoy dinners out with us and even go to many breakout sessions and main sessions. We were SO thrilled to see the improvements he made just that week alone. It was amazing. We have Quinton, Kim and Lori to thank for this big turn of events. And the Lord. Because He was gracious to us at every turn. One thing we were able to see and recognize every single day of this journey were His mercies. Every single morning they were new and tender. What grace He bestowed on us and the story that is told through this. Chris could have had problems with his muscles or even more serious issues, but the Lord in all His goodness spared us many more days or months or years of pain(s).

After we returned from that week away we were blessed beyond measure to be able to acquire a spot as a patient of Dr. John Johnston. He is a "total health" doctor. We saw him on September 28 and told him that we believed that Chris may be suffering from Fluoroquinolone Toxicity Syndrome and he didn't even blink. He absolutely knew about it and listened to everything we had to say.

Unfortunately, he said he could not tell us for sure what the outcome will be. Whether or not Chris would suffer for months, years or if there'd be permanent damage, but he would help us find the best answer he knew how. He offered us some more strategies for finding healing from this awful beast. He gave us a much, much stronger pro-biotic that Chris was only allowed to take for 15 days. He gave us a much, much stronger vitamin. He along with our Christian Counselor encouraged Chris to take back up running. Apparently, the gut and the brain are very well connected and the more exercise you can get in - the healthier it will all be.

This month of October has been full of days that are better and better and better. Chris isn't back to his 100% self yet, but he's WELL on his way. He's working full-time again and we are headed to a Marriage Retreat that our Church is hosting beginning today. We covet your prayers as we have begun training and studying for this new ministry we are absolutely in love with. We were able to celebrate last weekend at the annual banquet in Dallas and looking forward to launching LIFT (formerly known as Living Hope Houston) in Friendswood sometime after the new year starts.

In some of the darkest times, Chris would take baths with lavender or epsom salts to try to find calm and he would recite Psalm 40. And he would frequently thank us for not giving up on him. How could we? We knew there was something really real and dark going on. I asked him one of those times, "Exactly when did you memorize this scripture because I don't remember in our 25 years together really "knowing" this verse?" He gave me half a smile and said, "it's a U2 song." And I laughed out loud. Thank you U2 for your song straight from scripture that was one part of his healing, that was able to help him to cling to the hope that he would indeed set his feet upon a rock and make his footsteps firm once again. It's also where we got the title for this blog, "how long to sing this song?" How long? It's a question we ask sometimes, but we wait with full confidence that the Lord is going to use this and everything we learned from it for His glory.

The song that seemed to be on the radio every single time we were on our way to the many doctors visits is "Just Be Held" by Casting Crowns. It really captured what we felt and walked through so incredibly vividly. And in the storm is where we found Him. "In the arms of a God who won't let go. When you're on your knees and the answers seem so far away, you're not alone, stop holding on and just be held." Have you heard it? 

"Hold it all together, everybody needs you strong
But life hits you out of nowhere and barely leaves you holding on

And when you're tired of fighting, chained by your control
There's freedom in surrender, lay it down and let it go

So when you're on your knees and answers seem so far away.
You're not alone, stop holding on and just be held.
Your world's not falling apart, it's falling into place.
I'm on the throne, stop holding on and just be held.
Just be held, just be held

If your eyes are on the storm, you'll wonder if I love you still
But if your eyes are on the cross, you'll know I always have and I always will

And not a tear is wasted. In time, you'll understand
I'm painting beauty with the ashes. Your life is in My hands

Lift your hands, lift your eyes. In the storm is where you'll find Me.
And where you are, I'll hold your heart. I'll hold your heart
Come to Me, find your rest in the arms of the God who wont let go."

Being held,

~ Chris & Jen and Brynna Kate

24 Hours Till Liftoff

Twenty four little hours till we board the plane and by the time I finish writing this it'll be 24 hours till liftoff... we're just a complete ball of emotions.  The emotions can't even be described with words found in Webster's. Today, Simon is taking us out to a very special lunch. His treat! We are told to have holes in our pockets so we don't carry any cash. He is insisting on paying and it's very hard to accept, but we will. And we will enjoy our last meal, memories and laughter and tears with him. 

Then after 4:00 we'll be having several people stopping in to say goodbye and hug our necks. (Like Pierre (baby Marieanna & Gladime) and Cindy, James, Pastor Eschellete and his wife, Matthew, Robinson and anyone else we've forgotten). Please join us if you can! We hope to go get pizza, but we may possibly grab some rice/beans and chicken from the local resto. Just know our day will be full of Haitians telling us "goodbye... see you next time...when will you come again?" We don't know for sure. We are sure we'll visit again, but aren't giving a solid time that we'll be back.

We'll take loads of pics. I'll post later on FB probably.

The cry of our hearts this morning can be described in the song "Surely We Can Change" by the king himself, David Crowder: 

"Where there is pain, let there be grace.

Where there is suffering, bring serenity.

For those afraid, help them be brave.

Where there is misery, bring expectancy.

Surely we can change, surely we can change... something.

The world's about to change. The whole world's about to change!"

Our whole world's about to change and we couldn't be happier... or more sad...

Making It "Facebook Official"

Begin the music. Hear the violins cry and the electric guitar and piano fill the room. Just imagine Chris and I are singing and we sound like…let’s see...David Crowder and Christy Nockels (cause that's how we sound in our heads):

“You called us out upon the waters, (we called it "risking the ocean”) The great unknown where feet may fail... and there we found You in the mystery, in oceans deep, our faith did stand. And we did call upon Your name. And kept our eyes above the waves. When oceans rose, our souls did rest in Your embrace. For we are Yours, and You are ours!"

Are you hearing it? Isn't it beautiful?  

We've got so much to share about how God has been working in and through our lives this past year, but it's just sooo much. Let’s begin with…

When we returned to Haiti in January it was cold…so cold. We know you won’t believe it but we both slept with long pants (tucked into our socks), long sleeves (even a hoodie sometimes - with the hood up) under 3 blankets and still felt a chill in the air. We had relocated much higher into the mountains and the cold seemed to draw us even closer in our relationship with God as we found warmth in  growing in Him. Leadership was the topic of much of our reading and conversation during this time and God began to open our eyes, minds, and hearts to leadership lessons in our lives and in the ministry of A Door to Hope. It is very difficult to describe but we knew God was up to something and we began to pray and pray long and hard. We asked those closest to us to pray with us. And we put our hearts to the ground and begged for clarity. We had stepped out into “the great unknown” as we stepped off the plane to live in Haiti for this year and we felt once again that another “great unknown” was before us.

"Your grace abounds in deepest waters. Your sovereign hand will be our guide. Where feet may fail and fear surrounds us, you've never failed and You won't start now. So we did call upon Your name. And kept our eyes above the waves. When oceans rose our souls found rest in Your embrace, for we are Yours, and You are ours!" 

We had a wonderful month of March leading two teams (mostly from Tennessee) in Grand Goave and then had a week or two to catch up on paperwork. It was during this time that Chris became ill and really never could catch back up to full health.

So, in April we were heading back to the US for a break for a few weeks. Much of the time was spent dealing with doctors and running tests to determine why Chris’ digestive system had gone bazooka on itself. He was dealing with a lot of pain and discomfort. But, we had one very special time to getaway that a friend gave us – at her beach house! We took Brynna and it was awesome! It was during that week that we were drawn to a Church that had been praying and seeking the Lord’s timing in bringing a particular Pastor to join their team. We shook hands with the Senior Pastor, some of the lead Pastors, board members and sat down and shared life with them. This set off a series of encounters where they wanted to know more and we wondered what God was up to. We came back to Haiti in May and said, “Hey! Was that the Lord making the “Unknown” known?”

Through much struggle and prayer, we came to realize that God had placed us in Haiti to provide leadership for the A Door to Hope ministry in Haiti but our role as leaders had reached a limit. It was difficult to think that we might be leaving Haiti because it just seems so unspiritual to say that we are leaving the mission field. But we knew that this was exactly how God was leading in our lives. Once again we stepped out in faith and said to the Lord….we will follow wherever you lead us.

It was very near the end of May that Chris turned in his resignation letter to A Door to Hope and signed an offer from Friendswood Community Church to become the Pastor of Living Hope Houston. We offered to stay with A Door to Hope throughout the summer to finish leading the many mission teams coming and going this summer. We already have a wonderful relationship with Friendswood Community Church as Chris has had the privilege of leading their teams to Haiti for the past three summers. Pastor Kevin is the one from FCC who listened to the Holy Spirit when it didn’t make sense and pursued us for a Pastoral position at the Church. It is with great anticipation that we will leave Haiti on August 3^rd and not return in the same capacity. We will journey to Louisville to share in the celebration of the union of our son, Josiah to Katie Hennessy on August 8^th and then set out for Friendswood, Texas the very next week with Brynna as our own little family of three.

We thank you from the very depths of our hearts for your many encouraging words and deep prayers for us this past year. There is just no way we could have pressed on in following God’s calling in Haiti without it…we are sure of it.

“Spirit lead us where our trust is without borders. Let us walk upon the waters wherever You would call us. Take us deeper than our feet could ever wander. And our faith will be made stronger in the presence of our Savior!”

Teams: Three Weeks Back to Back

Well, it's been super quiet from me lately... for several months actually because it's very near impossible to put into black and white words all that needs to be said, but I've come to the conclusion that I cannot express all that's been going on in our hearts and minds this year (2015). Those of you who are closest to us will no doubt hear too many stories of hope and healing and suffering and anguish, but I simply cannot put them all out here anymore. God has taught and wrought our hearts this last year and I believe it'll still be months or years before our hearts can properly process everything.

We've just returned and possibly recovered from three weeks of back to back teams with A Door to Hope. I had an extra team thrown in the middle from Heart of God Haiti while Chris stayed in Grand Goave. The first week's team (June 13) was full of new faces and delay after delay in flights... and then missing bags - including "the one" with all the turkey, ham and cheese in it to feed the team lunch during the week. 

There was a youth pastor (Lance) who was able to bring his entire family - wife (Jen), two daughters (Megan and Mikayla) and a son (Dylan) that reminded me of us back in 2012 when we were able to bring the Ward party of five. What an experience to share! They brought a few other folks from their great state of Montana: Alex, Lily, Chase and Raedene.

And then there was Heath (dad) and Gracie (daughter) from Alabama. The image of Gracie in my mind brings a totally uncontrollable grin to my face. Her deep southern accent was JOYful! It made me long for pure innocence again. They are in the process of adopting from Haiti. They've got their dossier turned in/accepted and are waiting to be matched. Pray for them as they journey through this process. 

Then there's Tammy and Erica and Lexie. Lexie's been on several trips with us and is a Brentwood Academy Alumni who went away to college and brought her college friend along this time, who in turn brought her momma along for the ride. What a joy they were!

The second team - June 20 - went to Grand Goave and contained some of our most loved faith family from Temple Baptist in White House, Tennessee including the wonderful Andy, Emi and Drew who have opened up their hearts and lives to house our Brynna while we've been here January - August! Then there was Marliss and daughter Ashton, her friend Lexi and her mom, Lana. Then there was "madame mango" returning from the March team - aka Sherri with her son, Logan who's raised money to build MANY houses in Grand Goave. And Amelia returned for more adventures, too! Mark Carroll sent his son, Eben and grandson Ezra. Then we had newby Don from our Churh at Pleasant Grove.... and Chase from KY brought his little brother Garrett! Pastor Joe brought Tyler, Dylan, Sean, Eric, Matthew and mother daughter team: Elizabeth & Melissa were amazing!

This is where I left the A Door to Hope team and joined up with Erin, Dave and the Heart of God Haiti team up on the cool mountain! Erin and I played "Moose in the House" card game in the evenings and stayed busy all the days long... one night we even enjoyed a great treat - we ate popcorn and M&Ms!! (Thank you to my Montana friends!)

The third team - June 27 - was from Iowa, Ohio, Texas and Kentucky. They embraced life in Haiti and asked more thoughtful questions than I've ever been asked. We laughed and cried together many times throughout the week as we witnessed seeds being planted in people's salvation stories, the watering of the seeds and then were able to witness several men come to know the Lord and begin their journeys to know Him more. On this team were several returners who brought several to meet our glorious Haiti. Sherry brought big hugs from Doug (was on the Sept trip) and Kelsey, her son's girlfriend. She told me her whole life story the second night and I just wanted to take her home with me. She is such an inspiration and SO encouraging. Jodi repped the women as she was the only woman the first day at the house build. She never rested even for a second, but brought her son, Brady. Corrie brought her son, Eric and fell head over heels in love with the baby in the creche. Matt brought his dad Kevin and son, Canaan. That was sweet! Three generations of men serving together. Jackie & Dwayne came back with their daughter, Nicole and daughter in law Tiffany. Dwayne led us in worship each night playing the guitar backwards and upside down. Dwight (dad) & Nick (son) came back to the place that held sweet memories as they had adopted two children back in 2012 or so from the creche. Stephania stunned us all as she shared what it felt like to return to the place she knew as home before being adopted. Her friend, Emily (aka Red because of her koolaid dyed hair), returned once again to shine in VBS rec time as "Ms. Wolf" constantly telling the kids it was "manje time"! Ric, the engineer, inventor and overall hardest working teddy bear alive held the kids in the creche captive as he asked them questions and played with them. Chase stayed over from Grand Goave making it a two week trip. Mark stole many shots on his iPad and his excellent quality camera and then set up a flickr page so we can all share our photos. Kyle was the cool, quiet one in disguise because his name on his application was not Kyle! It was Jonathan. And last, but definitely not least was Megan who brought her cousin Emily. Megan was on our September trip to Grand Goave and came back to check out the mountains. It was GREAT to hang out with her all week.

Now, we are both recovering from sinus infections and the stomach bug. Both are or have been on anti-biotics this past week and are the epitome of exhaustion. It was only because of you who have prayed for us that we have been able to serve. The new friends God has introduced us to these last three weeks have been amazing with fantastic stories. We are so honored that He chose to weave our journeys together. We have two weeks to catch up on paper work and to-do lists and then we have two more weeks back to back with teams. Then we'll be heading home for a big wedding!! Thank you for your continued prayers for safety and health. They are greatly needed and appreciated. Chris and I are working on putting into words what has been swirling in our hearts and minds over the last few months. Thank you once again for reading. Until then, check out photos of the teams in my Facebook album "Haiti Stay: August 22, 2014..."

Commercial Break

Tomorrow we will wake up to three weeks back to back filled with team after team. Our hearts are heavy as we have finished up making preparations and eager to see what the Lord is going to do in and through us. We dream of August 3rd so we can return for a big wedding!!! Until then there's MUCH to be done.

Please pray for us as we near the half way mark of these 90 days in Haiti and dive right in to three hectic weeks. Please pray for Chris' health. It's good, but we need to make certain he doesn't "over-do-it" like he tends to do. He has a hard, hard time sitting back and watching. He loves to jump right in and carry that block and sift that sand at the homebuild. Pray that he is able to pace himself.

I will actually be back and forth between a door to hope teams and a Heart of God Haiti team. So, I won't be with him the entire 21 days. Erin is coming in next week and I'll get to visit with her and make preparations for the HOGH team. All the while, our Dearest friends will be returning to the states for their furlough. (Insert tears and sad faces here.)

We have a crazy busy time ahead of us, please pray for us to stay focused on the task at hand. I can't promise I'll be able to post much on the blog, but I'll try to put up a few photos as much as possible on Facebook. We look forward to seeing many of you and hugging your necks at the wedding. And we cherish your prayers. We could not have made it this long without them... and you! I have been sick the past week with flu-like symptoms minus the fever. But, I'm on the mend... ready for what tomorrow brings: TEAMS and excitement!!! 

P.S. Don't read on if you don't know or care anything about AT&T or Apple: I wish I knew someone who worked for AT&T who could help us with our bill. SOMEHOW we've been charged and even OVERcharged for data used on Chris' phone. I honestly think that the iPhone somehow stored up its data and then regurtitated it while we were in from April 8-May 10... Chris uses LESS than 7 GB of data on his Haiti plan each month - he has video staff meetings. But, AT&T thinks he used 13 GB while we were home for the short month! MOST of the time he was able to use wi-fi which you'd assume would have reduced his normal LESS than 7 GB plus the lack of video staff meetings on it. He spoke with AT&T and Apple while we were in the US, but just didn't have the hours to invest in "fixing" the problem. Enough of that. Just thought I'd throw it out there in case someone could shed light on this phenomenon.

Adventures with Joel and Merlin - Part One

A few weeks ago we hosted, well not really... maybe we partnered with, or better yet we tagged along on an adventure to deliver hope to Haiti. It's always a joy to be able to be where God is working and play some part in it even if it's just the tiniest of roles.

Joel with Pastor Wallace and Eleanor Turnbull May 2015

Meet Joel. Joel Troyer is a friend of BGM/a door to hope. He became inspired several years ago, I think in 2011, after being on a team trip with a door to hope and having a conversation or two with the Lord and also Madame Wallace (Eleanor) Turnbull (who has served Haiti for over 70 of her 90 something years), to do something more than be a team member on a trip to help Haiti. After much prayer and consideration he decided to start his own non-profit calling it Foundations of Hope and raise funds specifically to help improve the safety of buildings in Haiti. He began raising funds to provide pastors with a cement mixer to help improve the integrity of the concrete mixing and to help educate builders in the country. 

Meet Merlin. Joel brought his cousin and friend, Merlin Bontrager to share in the experience. It didn't take long for us to see the overflow of Merlin's heart. He shared with us the two most sacred stories of loss he has encountered in his lifetime. He lost his first wife to cancer many years ago after she had been rid of it. She died from the affects of treatment on her heart. It was a complete surprise to them as she was healthy one day and gone the next. His eyes leaked streams of tears of sorrow and gratefulness. He was grateful for the gift of her life and how it was joined with his and how they had made their life together. He then shared with us how their oldest son, Brett was always on mission. Always sharing the Good News. And how just last year Brett was overseas preparing to smuggle Bibles into a country and suffered a heat stroke and died at the age of 21, I believe. Chris, Merlin and I sat in the Caribbean supermarket cafeteria waiting on our dinners with tears staining all of our faces. We had just met at the airport, traveled half way up the mountain and stopped for food. As quickly as they entered the country he began to pour out his heart about the backstory of why he chose to come to Haiti.

Earlier that morning, our friend and driver, Francky picked us up and we headed to the airport to pick up our guests (Joel and Merlin). They were not staying with us in our apartment, but were renting a little apartment for five days on the campus of the Baptist Haiti Mission. We had a packed schedule that week.  We were to travel up to Calebasse to check on the mixer that Joel had already placed with Pastor Echelette and borrow his truck to help deliver a new mixer to Pastor Lejean in Grand Goave. We were to meet with Pastor Ezekiel from Kenscoff and share with him that he was next on the list of pastors to receive a mixer. It was an exciting week packed with good, good stuff.

But, on the way down the mountain to the airport we found ourselves behind a tap-tap that had only one boy and a momma in the back. The boy was sitting on the floor on a green blanket with some contraption on his leg and it was hard to tell what was exactly going on with him. But, we knew it was something and it wasn't exactly what you'd call good. Francky waved them down, stopped the tap-tap and asked the momma what was going on. She explained that the boy was in the hospital for 5 months and they finally sent him home because they could not fix it. The accident happened on Christmas day. He had somehow broken it and then it would not heal properly. It keeps swelling up. So, they put this contraption on him that seems like traction, maybe? We're not completely clear about the details. We assume that they were unable to set his leg properly after it broke and it has healed and it's just a mess. She explained that the father of the boy left her after only a few weeks because he couldn't afford to help pay for his hospital care. Francky pulled out a mil goude (1,000 goude equalling about 20 US) and handed it to the momma. Chris pulled out two tens (US) and handed it through Francky to her. We exchanged phone numbers to follow up and see if there is any way to help in the future. We asked if we could get a picture of the boy. So, Francky and Chris got out of the car and talked with the boy and then started sharing the gospel with the momma. She had never been converted and decided today was the day she wanted to leave everything behind and follow Christ. She understood her need for a Savior and had heard the Good News years before, but today was the day of her salvation. She prayed out loud expressing her heart full of repentance and need for Him. I snapped this picture of Pastor Chris and Pastor Francky. The momma is in the yellow dress with the tap-tap "chauffeur" listening over her shoulder.

To be continued...

The Countdown Has Begun

Been SUPER busy these last few weeks preparing for a SUPER busy summer. Just wanted to touch base and let you know we'll just blink and the summer will whiz by... trying to soak in all that He is teaching us along the way. Will expound by leaps and bounds more later. Prayers are appreciated each and every day for safety and health and opportunities to be a small part of His big plan! Cool stories coming... but, for now... just 57 more days in Haiti and then the BIG WEDDING and even more!! :D

Remembering Thirty+ Years of Marriage & Ministry

Thursday, May 24, 1990 is when our "official" journey began (thankfully we passed the WV mandated blood test before we could get a license to wed). We had dated for a year and a half in Huntington, Hurricane, Dunbar, Cross Lanes and Charleston, West Virginia during your last semester at Marshall University. I was there to watch you graduate with your teaching degree. Then you left for a summer mission trip to Kenya, Africa with Campus Crusade for Christ while I counted the long, hot days at the Wave Pool on a paper bag taped to the wall in the Raft Room. I’m quite certain Cindy Whaley must have gotten tired of hearing me tell stories of you and your bravery. You went from village to village showing the Jesus film. But, I know she wasn’t as happy as I was to have you back! When you returned you already had your first teaching job lined up and ready to go. You were going to be teaching the third and fourth grades at McCorkle Elementary in Lincoln County, WV with Connie Runyon as your first principal for the next several years. 

You moved out of your childhood home into your first apartment in Dunbar. Those were hard days that tested our faith as the teachers went on strike and we felt the growing pains of transitioning into adulthood. Many days you would work from 7 AM - 7 PM at the school and then come home to finish grading papers and lesson plans. And that was a short day. But, there were fun days, too. I would win free tickets to Christian skate night on Mondays through Joy 101 radio as I worked at the first ever Fellowship of Christian Athletes WV State Office. We would take our friends with us and we would "couple skate" to Steven Curtis Chapman’s I Will Be Here as I dreamed of days and years to come full of laughter... together.

It was October 18, 1989 when you got down on your knee at the WV State Capitol steps and asked me to be your wife and make a home together. You were wearing a jean jacket and the sun was beginning to set. We had been grading piles of papers all afternoon and you finally convinced me to “go for a walk” which I always thought was a perfectly romantic afternoon event. But, we had piles of papers to grade and report cards were needing to be completed! So, you literally had to drag me there. 

After the candles were lit, the birds were singing in the beautiful old wooden rafters, Mike Collins played his 12 string and flawlessly sang, I’ll Be Here, Gregg Terry led us through our wedding vows based on Ephesians 5 and we walked (I believe I was skipping) arm in arm down the aisle, we began to learn what it meant to make a home… together. 

We honeymooned in an a-framed cabin in the woods of Sutton, WV owned by Calvin and Carolyn Stover. After the long Memorial Day Weekend, we returned to our humble one bedroom, over-the-garage apartment with hand me down, mis-matched furniture, and we couldn't be more happy. First thing, we ventured out on our own to find a church family to call ours. We landed at Rebecca Littlepage Presbyterian Church with pews full of people who longed to follow Christ “In His Steps”. There was only one other young couple there - John & Rebecca. After church on Sunday nights Cal & Carolyn would have us over and feed us the best egg sandwiches you've ever had along with any wonderful leftovers they had. We watched their marriage and wondered what it would be like when we were their age, but couldn't even come close.

It was eight months into our marriage that we became pregnant, but didn't even know it until we lost her. We named her Eren and I cried a lot. (We didn't know the sex of the baby.) It took some time for me to make grief my friend instead of my enemy. And I finally agreed that heaven would hold her for now and I let go.  

We spent too many nights per week at my parents house longing for connection. They fed us and we played cards. My mom finally told me she had been praying for us to have friends our own age. Not that she didn't want to hang out with us literally every other night, but that she wanted us to have healthy relationships with people going through the same seasons of life together.

It was about this time that we started frequenting the local Christian Book store (Bible Book Store downtown and at the Charleston Town Centre) and met Terry & Debbie Hodge. Terry was the manager and we would ask him for advice on good books. He read a lot, talked a lot and pointed us to several life changing books. One of our very favorites is No Compromise by Keith Green. This began to be the theme of our marriage and ministry together. It is when we began to "risk the ocean" but we just didn't call it that... yet. We started spending time with Terry & Debbie sharing meals and memories. We loved watching their lives of total surrender. They inspired us more than they'll ever know. They didn't have heaps of earthly possessions and they never complained. They had mountains of joy of rivers of wisdom and they shared with us. They had two beautiful daughters and strived to serve Him with all they were. They were another beautiful example for us to see.

“I will be here when you feel like being quiet. When you need to speak your mind, I will listen. And I will be here when the laughter turns to crying. Through the winning, losing and trying, we’ll be together. ‘Cause I will be here.”  I Will be Here by Steven Curtis Chapman

It was in the middle of the night that I woke up and realized that my water had broken and we called Terry & Debbie. They loaned us their video camera so that we could take it to the hospital to capture Rachael's first cry. They were those kind of friends. We stopped over at their house around 3 AM and they prayed for us and the delivery and health of the baby that would be born the very next day. That was August 1992. And we welcomed our first child into the world. We were blessed beyond measure. We were young and dumb and knew not what we were doing, but the Lord gave us much grace and wisdom all along the way.

It wasn't a few months before we started hanging out with David & Cathy. It was like we had known each other our entire lives. We clicked from the get go. We started sharing meals at least twice a week if not more and then on the weekend we'd be at one house on Friday and the other house on Saturday. This is where Chris first developed his love for coffee. Cathy taught him how to grind coffee. They had a daughter, Danielle who was 3 or 4 years old and were able to answer many of our practical questions about raising children. (They had Mason near the same time we had Rachael and then they had Jacob when we welcomed Josiah into our lives.) But, first, we watched and cried as Clinton was voted in as President. It was true bonding time. We literally had Rachael and Masons in the swing while we cried as he was voted and then sworn in. Cathy & I loved to make no-bakes and taste the chocolate before it got the oats and peanut butter...Mmmm :P

When Rachael was 9 months old we took our first huge "risking of the ocean". At least the first huge one that people could see. We joined staff of Campus Crusade for Christ. Chris gave up his teaching position and we set out for summer long staff training in Fort Collins, Colorado. It was good. So good in fact we called home on a pay phone paying in quarters to talk for 15 minutes at a time. Just enough time to break the news to our parents that we were expecting again. We moved in with my parents for a few months until baby boy was born and then rented a little two bedroom townhouse. Josiah was born when Rachael was 18 months old. Yes, they were close in age. His pregnancy and first year were picture perfect. He was a joy. Before his first birthday, we found out we were expecting again. Happy Valentine's Day 1995!

Rachael was 3 years, 1 month and 2 days old when Brynna was born. Josiah was just over 18 months. We had a 3 year old, an 18 month old and a newborn... all in one little 2 bedroom townhouse. THOSE were the days! My pregnancy with Brynna was complicated and high risk for many reasons. Mostly because of five pregnancies in under 5 years. We also had a miscarriage between Rachael and Josiah. We named that baby Ryan. That loss hurt, too.

My pregnancy with Brynna was not typical or easy. It was very hard. At 15 weeks I had a threatened miscarriage and was put on bed rest. At 27 weeks I went into labor and literally contracted for the next 10 weeks. At 34 weeks I spent a solid week in the hospital with salmonella poisoning! It was at this point that my eyes were opened as I watched you work incredibly hard and show me more of what it meant to serve one another. I still remember nights where you sat and played Spades with me even though you were exhausted from the day's work followed by feeding, bathing, playing and night time routine with the kids. You showed me a walking, talking, breathing, very practical example of what it means to be a servant. Now as I look back knowing that my love language is quality time, I feel bad for all the time that I stole from you. But, just as bad as I may feel I feel honored that you loved me so very much. But, I know you don't see it that way. It sure would have been easier during that time if my love language was acts of serve. Lol. Cause you had that one covered!

“I will be here and you can cry on my shoulder. When the mirror tells us we’re older I will hold you. And I will be here to watch you grow in beauty and tell you all the things you are to me.” I Will Be Here by Steven Curtis Chapman

As we were having children the amount of support we were required to raise adjusted accordingly. After 3 years, we knew the Lord was pushing or pulling us in a different direction. We still desired to be in full-time ministry. So, with broken hearts, we left what was behind and started looking for what it was that He was calling us to. He led us to move away for a brief time to Parkersburg to start in the 84 Lumber manager trainee program where we kept our money in the freezer and when we had enough at the end of the week - we walked down and got "yum yums" from the local donut shop. We enjoyed time with Brian and Susan immensely, but it was just after 6 months that we moved home and you worked 6 months selling Orkin pest control.

It was about this time that my parents introduced us to a young couple from their church, Preston and Lisa. We had so much fun sharing memories and meals with them... but, I didn't really cook much. Not many (literally maybe a handful, but no more) on this planet can cook better than Lisa Huggins! Plus, I had three little ones! They had Amber and we began spending lots of time with them. Two of our favorite dishes were corn pudding and mexican cornbread. EVERY dessert she made was off the charts. At this point, you found a full time job with benefits at CASCI (Blue Cross/Blue Shield) and we found a FOUR bedroom apartment to rent!

Once we moved back to town, though, our former church had a new pastor and we needed a change. We began to search for a church for our young family. We were set to go check out a church from friends from college, but their town literally flooded that weekend. We had the kids all ready to go before we realized how bad the flood was and we were determined to find a new place to call home. So, my mom mentioned that their was a new, young pastor that she'd heard of in North Charleston. We went. And we fell in love with his family and the church at first sight. It wasn't long until Chris was hired part time to be the Youth Pastor. We were still longing for that full-time opportunity. After a couple years of completely meshing with Rick and Linda and their son, Seth who was the same age as Josiah, they received a position back in their hometown and left. Us. Brokenhearted. We went without them for 9 months until we were called for a full-time ministry position in July of 1999 at their new church!

We raised our kids in Louisville, Kentucky. It became home. We planted ourselves deep. The roots grew strong. We loved the people of Ormsby Heights and served alongside them for 14 years. The kids played YMCA soccer, church softball, basketball and your position at the church was flexible enough to allow you to be a chaperone on most school field trips. When we rolled up in the minivan to pick the kids up from school days, the guard would radio to the gym, "Ward Babies". My parents came to visit about once a month and stayed very close to the kids. It broke my parents hearts to see us go, but they didn't dare want to hold us back.

In September of 2001 I began to realize my struggle with depression and at the urging of a great friend sought out a doctor's help. During these years we spent lots of hours making memories and meals with Kenny & Roy Ann and their kids. Those were precious times and times we'll never forget. The kids would all play together for hours as we planned youth events. You held my hand as my body could not handle depression and you guided me through a jungle of emotions. It was what I thought was the darkest days of my life, but it was really a time of preparation for what was to come.

It was January of 2003 that my mom's heart stopped beating on this earth abruptly and simultaneously was present with Jesus. I had begun working at the UL Dental School as a receptionist just a few months prior. The kids were all in school and I had a strong desire to get out and about so I didn't dwell in depression. It was a warm Thursday and I didn't wear a coat to work. It was sunny and I had just returned from my lunch break when Rick drove you downtown to pick me up. You came and called me out into the hallway and said you had some bad new for me. Some really bad news. Then the world literally started to spin. You leaned back against the wall to hold yourself up and I just started talking crazy. You were getting my purse and lunch bag and telling my co-workers you were taking me home. I was saying to patients in the waiting room, "I'm dreaming. This is not happening. This cannot be real." I'll never forget some lady grabbing my hand and telling me that I would get through it. I kept asking you, "how do you know? Who told you?" My logic and reason were going into over drive. I needed concrete facts.

Somehow I ended up in the living room in the recliner looking out the window as piles of clothes were around me trying to be sorted to pack to take the kids to Gramps'. I remember as plain as day looking out the window staring at the green pine trees and the beautiful blue sky in complete disbelief. You went to get the kids from school. We packed and left. Anything that you needed to do was left behind. Dropped. And I was your first priority. We packed up the green Silloutte van and headed to Nana and Gramps'.

Rick and Linda, Matt and Stephanie and Kenny and Roy Ann and families came and stayed at the Best Western in Teays Valley. They helped us with every single need we had. We walked through those days together. Matt and Stephanie took the kids back and lived at our house while we stayed in WV for a week helping Gramps get things together. You waited on us hand and foot. You cooked, cleaned, cried with us, pushed us, made phone calls, changed the sheets on the beds, took van loads of Nana's stuff to donate. The days were a blur. We were walking in total shock. You came up with the most awesome funeral message ever "She Held Nothing Back" and I know she would have been so very proud of you, but I'm also certain that at that moment she didn't care. She was lost in worship that we can only imagine.

In 2011, we took the College Age Singles on a mission trip to Haiti which changed the course of our lives. Beginning with your initial scouting trip with Rachael, Meredith, Nabeel and yourself in 2010 and over the next couple years you had lead Ormsby Heights to Haiti five different weeks with BGM/a door to hope. In 2012 our Ward Party of Five was able to serve together in Haiti. You had become a "frequent flyer" and familiar with the leadership. They told you of an open position and I said, "no way". And no again. But, the Lord began to show us that this was exactly where He wanted us to "risk the ocean" next. So, we shared with Rick and Linda and then our kids and they all agreed, "yes, you need to pray about this." So, we did. And it was a resounding YES! As we've said before, it was definitely not because we loved Haiti more than Ormsby. That's not true at all. The truth is we did not want to step one hair outside of His calling on our lives. So, we jumped... together!

There are literally too many people from Ormsby to list that we were close to and I won't list them because I don't want ANYone to feel left out. Many of our closest friends were youth workers. We served tirelessly together through years of Go-Tell Camp, Fall Retreats, J-Creek summer camp, Gatlinburg Retreats, lockins, outreaches and inreaches. They along with the youth were family. We did ministry together. We were on a journey together to impact the world. And quite honestly, it still hurts quite a bit to think of the reality of the grief of leaving them as we followed Him. It was in July of 2013 that we learned that being in the center of God's will isn't always the easiest place to be. It can hurt even when you are walking in complete obedience.

We sold the house, purged, packed up the UHaul and left Rachael and Josiah in Louisville taking Brynna with us to begin the next chapter of our lives in Nashville. For one year we lived in an awesome two bedroom condo with three bathrooms and a pool! We got a new car, a puppy and tried lots of cool places to eat, but we were really missing our faith family. And we were missing our time with our Ward party of five.

In August of 2013, Rachael married Quinton and made it a Ward party of six. It was a year of transitions for sure and great loss of all we knew and were comfortable with. You spent more weeks away from us leading teams to Haiti than I care to recall. In March of 2014 you went to Haiti for 2 solid weeks of intense language training where you got an idea that we could actually move our family to and live in Haiti. You called with the idea and I told you to please come home and we'd talk about it. It was another of those God moments where it was plain as day what we were to do. So, once again, together with Brynna we jumped... and in August of 2014 we decided to give it a try... 90 days at a time. (I won't go into all the details since it can be read about in our blog.)

We went home for a break in December and enjoyed Christmas gaining a few extra pounds and enjoying luxuries we had gone without. And we returned to Haiti January 8 for another round without Brynna. She stayed behind to pursue her college education. We moved into the "gingerbread house" in Kenscoff and froze our buns off. We had hours and hours of conversations about what the Lord was showing us. We realized more and more the difference between a need and a want. We asked the Lord for more wisdom as we desire to go and make disciples. We returned to the states for another break and spent more than 8 days concentrated on your health as your digestion had major issues. On a positive note, we were able to enjoy a break at the beach with Brynna (an awesome gift from a Haiti team member). And the funnest news of our break was that Josiah had totally surprised Katie and asked her to become part of our future Ward Party of Seven. Wedding set for August 8!!

On May 10, Mother's Day, we returned to Haiti to our third place of residence - Mission Baptiste. We are living high on the hog here. We have way more than we've ever had in any other place we've lived in Haiti. We are beyond blessed. It's a temporary agreement and a true blessing for us. The Dearing family lives a yell away and we enjoy making memories and meals together. Of course, they usually do all the making of meals since they have a vehicle and we don't. You should definitely read more about them in our blog. They are the dearest of friends!

We celebrated 25 years of marriage and ministry by sleeping in a bit and going to La Florville for lunch. The Dearings made us a loaf of HOMEMADE (from scratch) bread!! Mmmmm!!! Delicious breakfast and dinner! We were walking in the front door and a moto beeped at us. It was Nelson and Robison. He asked if you could change a string on his guitar. Right there. Right then. We accepted their special greetings of "happy birthday" after we told them that we were celebrating our anniversary. You enjoyed a steak with mushrooms and I got the grilled pork. It was yummy and we talked for a long time. We even got dessert! Then we called our moto man, Merilus and blessed him with a little extra for the ride back home. Now, I'm trying to finish this up for you and you are eating a bowl of cereal with your nasty powdered milk. I'm looking forward to the things that the Lord will teach us in the next 25 years (if He so blesses us with them). And I'm thrilled to be risking the ocean with you! You are way more than I ever deserve! You are my treasure, my love, my life. I love you honeyman!! Happy silver anniversary!! You are my favorite everything!

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Here's the "in-between" details of the missing years (2015-2019): "How Long Must I Sing This Song?"

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Beautiful Margo Rey

It's now 2019 and we're celebrating 29 years in our new life in Texas. Biggest difference is we now need cheaters to read... hence the larger print! We've been here serving with Living Hope Ministries since August 2015. Our fourth grandchild was just born a week ago! So, this blog needs updated!! But, who has the time?! I'll make it real quick. Grandchildren are a double blessing from the Lord! Margo Rey came into this world on May 16 just three months separate her and Canaan Jack. Piper Quinn just turned 17 months old and Zion Elliott will be 3 years old next month! So, that's four babies in just under 3 years. Our quiver is full for sure! So, the adventure continues... and at some point I'll have to give you ALL the details. But, for now, know that we are still in it to win it. We have experienced grief upon grief this last year and have come to appreciate each other and the time we've been given even more.

Canaan

Zion

Piper

Judah, 2022!! Read his MIRACULOUS story HERE

Here's a couple messages Chris gave at our church, The Harbor. 
When God Seems Silent  

When Mercy and Justice Collide   

The Truth About Lying

A Family Photo

Welcoming Our Weaknesses

Walking in God's Presence 

It's now 2023 and I have a very special birthday gift expected early July from Josiah & Katie and Brynna & Garrett are giving me a very special Christmas gift! So, that'll be SEVEN grandchildren by the end of 2023. We are beyond blessed. 

"And if it wasn’t for God’s mercy and His grace, there’s no way we would be standing in this place. But, because He has been faithful every step along the way, here we are together. We’ve climbed up mountains higher than were ever in our hopes and plans. We’ve held onto each other’s hands, watched miracles unfold together. And we’ve crawled on our hands and knees through valleys cold and dark and deep.” Together by Steven Curtis Chapman