It’s day 101 of The Bible Recap and I’m still on track without missing a day. But, I did get off track somewhere lately with what I was looking for in my readings. On day one the host challenged us to look and listen for glimpses of God in our readings because He is where the joy is. It’s easy to find ourselves reading a devotional or portion of scripture for the shear purpose of applying it to our current situation or question we’re asking God. And she challenged us to avoid this practice. I found myself again looking for how I can use scripture as a weapon. I’m not proud of this, but I’m sharing with you in an effort to practice vulnerability.
So, yesterday & today our Bible readings were from 1 Samuel chapters 9-14 and it didn’t take my mind long to start equating the face of King Saul with a person in my life who is difficult for me to love because they reject me and seem to operate out of fear & hastiness. I consistently find myself not wanting to treat them as I want to be treated, but treat them as I feel they are treating me. Lord, please help me. As I studied through 1 Samuel 13 & 14 today I was amazed to see what happened when the prophet Samuel gave specific instructions, “Seven days you shall wait, until I come to you and show you what you shall do.” (1 Samuel 10:8).
And then in chapter 13 it was time to wait. Here’s what happened: “And the Philistines mustered to fight with Israel, thirty thousand chariots and six thousand horsemen and troops like the sand on the seashore in multitude. They came up and encamped in Michmash, to the east of Beth-aven. When the men of Israel saw that they were in trouble (for the people were hard pressed), the people hid themselves in caves and in holes and in rocks and in tombs and in cisterns, and some Hebrews crossed the fords of the Jordan to the land of Gad and Gilead. Saul was still at Gilgal, and all the people followed him trembling. He waited seven days, the time appointed by Samuel. But Samuel did not come to Gilgal, and the people were scattering from him. So Saul said, “Bring the burnt offering here to me, and the peace offerings.” And he offered the burnt offering. As soon as he had finished offering the burnt offering, behold, Samuel came. And Saul went out to meet him and greet him…” 1 Samuel 13:5-10
I am ashamed to say I was literally raising my fist, comparing Saul with my acquaintance… literally found my heart screaming, “You coward! Look how your actions are hurting others - especially me! There are people who are hiding in caves, holes, rocks, tombs and cisterns AND they’re trembling. What a fool you are! You can’t even follow simple instructions to wait 7 days until Samuel comes to show you what to do! Take that!” And I picked up my drink to take a sip and saw myself in Saul. No longer my acquaintances’ face, but mine.
“And Samuel said to Saul, “You have done foolishly. You have not kept the command of the Lord your God, with which he commanded you. For then the Lord would have established your kingdom over Israel forever. But now your kingdom shall not continue. The Lord has sought out a man after his own heart, and the Lord has commanded him to be prince over his people, because you have not kept what the Lord commanded you.” 1 Samuel 13:13-14
I pointed one giant index finger toward my acquaintance (in my mind) assigning guilt and all the while 3 were pointing right back at me. I was wrong. My sin is no less or greater than theirs. But, it’s sin just the same. I woke up this morning with Psalm 51 on my heart and so it was natural to turn to it as I repented. I soaked in His Word, His forgiveness, His mercy, His grace and His promises as my heart was broken before Him.
“Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin! For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight, so that you may be justified in your words and blameless in your judgment… Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me… Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit… O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise. For you will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it; you will not be pleased with a burnt offering. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.” (Parts of Psalm 51)
“Take comfort - nothing can ruin God’s plan; He’s active in every tick of the clock.” Tara-Leigh Cobble, The Bible Recap
*Taken from weekly LIFT email.
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